Between today & tomorrow

I would rather believe I am lazy than admit I am weak

Mon, 15 Aug 2011 23:21:43 GMT

I made myself wait until the next summer to decide what to do with my life. My health was horrible then and I hadn't the energy to function, let alone live, and spent most of my home hours laying on the floor recovering from an office job. (Sitting in an office was, apparently, really hard.) I never lost the ability to function, I just tired real easy. Then September came, the weather broke, it cooled down and I recovered to normal.

Despite the extremes we've had, this summer has been generally mild. The hot spells still wiped me out, even when I'm in cool AC all day. (Those 5 days in 70 deg temp control? Probably really good for me, even if I am freezing. I have a hard time keeping home temperatures at 78, let alone 76, and I can feel the difference some days.) But I have a better feel of it now, I know it's not going away but it can be controlled. Life will be harder for me than most, but that's true for more people than can be counted. I'm good most of the year.

It's reaching decision making time and, in keeping with most things, my subconscious figured this out long before me. Thanks to the US Dept of Labor's Occupational Handbook (which I posted for our Student Resource page) I've learned that I'm a technical writer, specifically, a science writer. (As far as titles go. There's a biological scientist and that's how specific it gets so tech writer is good enough.) As part of my job, I've started using illustrator in the adobe suite and working on our webpages. Both of these are very peripheral (I can update links and change text, not create webpages, and illustrator and photoshop have been used to convert or check things). If I ask, though, I might be able to get monetary help with courses about them. Or, which I'd prefer except I wouldn't get certified (though, if I leave AMS, I could include it. I don't have certification or education in writing/editing either), I could work on tutorials at work or just go through the manual. (The reason this would be at work is that my present computer is a netbook, which is small, and I'd rather not spend time doing anything other than fun stuff on it.)

Among other things, this would make me very marketable. (Should I decide to leave DC, if I stay in DC I will stay at AMS. I like it here.) It would, however, mean an office job for forever. That's what this work is. And what do I do but come home and sit in my apartment? (Going out in the summer is hot and exhausting, in the winter it is dark. Actually, in the winter I hang out with friends more, summer sorta sucks because my friends are all busy. I think this may be part of the reason I'm feeling a bit lonely right now. They're starting to return, and I'll be busy and so have less wanderlust.)

Today though, while checking links, I wished I could get out... ...

Hee. This was really bothering me, I thought it was a huge epiphany, but writing this out it strikes me that my discontent was just part of the job. It was boring and dull today, all my big projects are done, I'm working on odds and ends, don't know what's next, we've been having a horrible time with our Ocean Studies book (late to the publishers, problems with binding, this that, on and on, and some new stupidity every day), etc. But I really enjoy the rest of it. I enjoy the writing and editing. (I really enjoy the editing, they probably think I'm nuts.)

I guess this is the thing. What I wanted to do with my life was to be outside, not an office, to feel free and make my own way (wildlife management is pretty independent). That's not going to happen, most likely because I've done what I've wanted. Maybe I overstressed my body, maybe it was coming regardless, maybe I slowed or rushed it, but, whatever, I can't do the outside thing. Wishing won't change that, life isn't so kind, but it was kind enough so I could find another way to do what I love. And I do enjoy it.

HA! I finally got on livejournal to write out my problems and discovered I don't really have any. Win for me!
Have a nice day.

(ps: no, I still don't know how to handle the title but I've a habit of laying on my bed in the sun after a shower and falling asleep nowadays. It's a weekend thing (there's no sun when I get out of the shower on weekdays) and quite confusing.)

Hello 2:30am!

Fri, 29 Jul 2011 07:05:42 GMT

The wee hours of the morning are not the time I should be awake anymore. I now have grown up working hours and it is best if I am sleeping until the bigger morning hours. That is not the case this morning, however, so we'll just accept that.

In more exciting (but even less good) news, my wallet was stolen yesterday morning. I thought it was stolen in the afternoon and am still amazed at the time frame in which it was snatched. I have my smartrip (metro) card in my wallet so it disappeared between the metro exit and work, which is one corner, an escalator and crosswalk distance. I had to wait at the crosswalk for 30 sec so, altogether, the whole thing probably took 3 minutes, if that. There is the possibility that I dropped it instead of replacing it in my purse. Whoever took it, or found it, didn't waste too much time in using it. Not big purchases, only those that don't require signing. Convenience versus security.

The cards are now canceled, I've a few more things to handle tomorrow morning (replacing my ID, canceling my smartrip card, filing a police report) but, as far as that goes, I'm set. I've emergency money, thankfully, so I can buy groceries, as I can't charge anything or get cash from the bank, and the chunk of change I did lose will curtail my pitiful social life as well.

The worst part, however, was that I discovered the lose right before buying ice cream. No ice cream for Katie! :(

stupid heat

Sat, 23 Jul 2011 23:08:25 GMT

(In case you're curious, yes, I'm reacting to the heat. My earrings are weird. I think I'm losing sensation around the earlobes but not within the lobes so I keep turning them and trying to itch my ear. This is my response to going numb - I scratch. It's a subconscious reaction and only makes it worse. I can't feel the scratching. Fortunately, my brain kicks in and I stop. That's the least of the effects. The cool effect is that I sleep like the dead. I know this is because my body's past exhausted but I've had trouble sleeping lately so I'll take what I can get.)

I had to move the latest batch of ale from the coat closet to the clothes closet. The coat closet got too warm so we're just going to hope the amber ale doesn't foam over. It's pretty unusual they do but it's with my clothes now; that would suck. I'm still about 6 degrees too high but that's better than 10. I suppose I could turn up the AC more... but not enough. 68-72 F is COLD. My brew can cope. It'll just be fruitier and less alcoholic (yeast converts the sugar to esters, which taste fruity, above 75 F). Or, I'll compromise, we'll drop the temp to 76. Ages ago, I bought a black lager but that brews cold, 45-55. I'm mailing it to my parents, I don't have a basement. Wheat beers have a wider range of temperatures, 62-85, so I'll pretend that's why I'm brewing one next. (Explains a lot about it being a summer brew though. Of course, if I was a monk with a monastery, I bet I'd have nice cool cellars for fermenting my beer. I'd have to be a guy though, I don't think nuns brewed. I may also have to be a bit more religious.)

While pulling out some papers stored in the clothes closet, I decided I should clean the whole thing. Though a good idea in the long run, it means my mostly clean bedroom became a mess. (Cleaning the closet = taking everything out and dumping it on the bed then on the floor) I discovered I could fit on the bottom shelf then took a nap (in bed) and now it's almost 7pm!!! What happened to the day? Why am I more cranky after taking a nap then before? (Poor cats. But not that poor. I had to do my laundry last night because the big cat took a dump on my bed. I'm still pretty irritated with him. He almost got dropped in the bathtub with the soaking sheets. That was before I realized I should just wash them. I was really tired.) I am still really tired, I'd have tea if it wasn't so late. Or I'll have some herbal tea, it'll be warm and soothing.

LEMONS!

Sun, 08 May 2011 13:07:16 GMT

I signed up for a local fresh vegetable delivery service thing, and they bring me a crate of fresh veggies every Thursday (provided I order it, which I'm not this week because I've an over abundance of veggies already). But they're just random veggies, and each time they have included lemons. I cannot tell you how much these lemons have befuddled me. Vegetables, regardless what kind, can be turned into a stew or made special or something but, for me, you just eat fruit. Chomp, chomp, chomp. But I am not eating a lemon. (I received 2 or 3 lemons each time, that is not enough for lemonade, which I'm not that interested in making anyway.)

Eventually (while eating out) it struck me that I could put them in water! (shut up) And so I did and they are delicious in tea (all by themselves) as well as in cold water and I am delighted with my lemons. (I even tried to eat a lemon, out of curiosity, and decided it definitely needs to be diluted.)

Out of procrastination, I looked up 'hot water with lemon.' (This is much like looking up the word 'cheese' or 'dragon.') I read about diets and health benefits and 'how to prepare hot water with lemon,' which was ridiculous. But they missed out on the main point in nearly all the posts (or else, they hid it somewhere in the middle and I, merely amused, didn't actually read it all) - LEMON IS DELICIOUS IN HOT/COLD WATER!!

I'm fully aware that this isn't that amusing of an antidote, but I don't care. I'm going to drink my lemon tea now. mmmmmmmm

humph

Sun, 23 Jan 2011 01:31:00 GMT

I have got to learn to live with myself,

why so many words?

Sun, 16 Jan 2011 15:29:48 GMT

I've writer's block and, as other have tried to use lj as a way to get past it, I thought I'd have a go. Can't be much worse than staring at the same last paragraph nightly for weeks on end. I'm currently blaming work, because I'm finally getting to do what I was hired for - edit the text books. We're revising the ocean text book and, with each section (from 3 to 20 (ack!) pages) that Joe has updated, he sends them to be and I go over them and make them easier to read. (You know, so they don't read like a really boring textbook, just like a boring textbook because it is still a textbook and I think that's in the definition.) While I work, I also get to do research and double check facts and I've learned more about the ocean in the past month than in any class I took (sorta), as I'm going through and rearranging the paragraphs, cutting out confusingly repetative material, getting rid of words that are too big for an intro class (equipotential!?! I think that was the most recent word and it took me some serious searching to even begin to understand it, and it really wasn't worth the effort), and generally moving things around so they're readable and understandable. And it's a lot of fun. I really like playing with words, I like the concepts behind them (except iron fertilization, that sucked and I had to put a disclaimer in at the top saying I disapproved so I wouldn't try to argue EVERY point that this Martin jerk made. I understand the concept but it's stupid and ineffective. at this point, you're just littering.)
...
Gotta love it when people rant about something they enjoy because it makes it hard for them to do something they enjoy more.

The rest of life is going well. I bought myself a wii over Christmas (my mom had bought one (with wii fitness) for herself and Dad and I finally gave in and got one). Humorously, I am unable to hook it up because I have to buy a converter for my computer and haven't done so yet. I had some of an excuse, because this past week (starting with the Friday before last) has been so social that I haven't had a day to myself until yesterday. It was all good things, spent time with Matt and then Karen and Bryan over last weekend. Trivia (as always) on Monday, and then got together with co-workers and ex-co-workers on Tuesday (it's great, Tom is still very bitter and all his advise is about sticking around long enough to leave. Emily, on the other hand, left on much better terms and appreciated the old job, even if not really her stuff. Heather took that over and it's all administrative work - Heather has a masters in Meteorology and is frustrated with it but it is still a job at the American Meteorological Society, which looks spiffy on a resume and, perhaps more importantly, it's a JOB. Eventually, we'll get Mo and Tom (she ended up with his old job) together after she's had a tough day with Jim and it'll be 'interesting.' I'm glad I don't work directly under Jim, our director can be a seriously inconsiderate and demanding jerk. Beth and Joe are much more awesome.) Um... oh yes, Wednesday was a surprise happy hour, at work, because the Policy Dept had just hired a Fellow and had some extra (nasty) bottles of wine, and then there was the caving meeting (with margaritas! yum! and deadly). Thursday was a mandatory building meeting - they're going to renovate, which means moving us renters about. It was good and informative and BORING. On top of all that, my stupid period was not showing up and not showing up, which it did so kindly yesterday, right before I went across the street to buy a pregnancy test. (Last period started Dec 1st, this one Jan 15th. Next time I'm going to ignore it until the two months. grumble.)

Well, that won't be interesting to anyone except me and I'd never leave such large paragraphs in any other writing. However, I have an orange to eat and cats to play with. (I have come home to eat and sleep, they are in need of attention.)

Chao

random story

Mon, 03 Jan 2011 22:57:33 GMT

Once upon a time, this morning, I refused to wake up and was running on the later side of on time. The ridiculously playful cats were not helping me speed along, but, finally, I decided I would toss the mouse for Carter one last time (Dresden had already lost his toy and I wasn't going to look for it again) then put my gloves on and leave. However, I misjudged Carter's excitment and nearness because, when I picked up the mouse, he made a swipe at it and got my finger instead. In response, the side of my finger immediately began to bleed, I yelped and Carter jumped away and gave me a reproachful glare as if I'd hit him. I told him he was a bad cat and went into the bathroom for a bandaid.

Being blind (apparently) I saw neither of the two boxes until I almost gave up (planning to wrap tp and tape around my already ointmented finger), then picked up the higher of the two. (They're on different levels.) At which point in time, I discovered I do not give high pitched shrieks when startled but, with a deep voice, loudly spout nonsense. (such as "potato ostrich" which is not what I said, I've already forgot that, but something similarly bizarre.) You see, the box, instead of being flat, had a lump on it which moved when I picked it up. As it turns out (proven Sunday while cooking) it was warm enough in DC for several of the stupid stink bugs to wake up and migrate indoors, again. I think, however, he migrated down the drain, as he (and the box of bandaids) had been thrown into the sink (by me) and the sink has no drain cover.

Then I went to work and was not late (but very much just exactly on time) except I forgot my key card so I couldn't get in. And thus began my first day back after vacation and the first Monday of 2011.

mental note

Mon, 20 Dec 2010 01:32:23 GMT

Next time I find a boyfriend, I want a morning person. I'm sick of staying up late and waiting around in the morning.

ren fest purchase

Mon, 11 Oct 2010 14:30:33 GMT

Guess what!!
A) my life has gone and gotten complicated and now I have a social life (stupid social life) but it'll be short lived because next month is November and everything will be sacrificed for writing. Which is a lie, it just means sleep will be sacrificed and I'll write at work. (pobre work, but they should give me more to do on a more consistent basis if they want me to be effective. Not needing to be effective, I am less than they think to require. sillies.)

B) Went to the ren fest yesterday (Yes, it's a festival in maryland. Had a discussion with matt about how it is a faire and everything, but the sign says festival. stupid signage.) The maryland fest is HUGE, a farmer has been converting extra wooded land into ren habitat over the years. Want an idea how big? We spent an HOUR in line waiting to turn left onto the street of the parking entrance and we were only contending with part of the DC visitors. (Karen, Bryan and co came from the opposite direction, turning right, and didn't have as long of a wait, but still a significant one. But it hadn't been like that previously! Not ever)

Okay, that's not the interesting part. (Of the many interesting parts. We'd raspberry wine, made from only raspberry's. good stuff. Also, mead. Also, cream stout, into which I later poured some mead. Oh, and I made a disgusting mix, prior, of octoberfest and blueraspberry snow cone. It turned green and I threw it out. In all fairness, I sorta knew it was a bad idea when I tried it but I was tired of carrying around the snow cone.)

Drinking habits aside. We looked at a painter's gallery (of which there are many) and saw a don quixote print, which I thought was lovely and desired (I'm trying to decorate my abode). However, not only didn't I want to carry it around, I have that rule that I have to come back if I want something. In retrospect, that rule didn't really apply here, because the print was small and only $15. I spent as much when I bought Matt the 'double' mead (that and wine are served in half glasses, beer in full) and myself the cream stout. (Which the bartender/wench found funny, because we had our mugs and she was ready to give me the mead but I wanted the dark beer and he the honey wine, and then I paid. So take THAT, gender roles. ... this has nothing to do with the painting story.)

At the end of the day, when we went back to the shop, all the don quiote prints were gone. I asked at the desk and they flipped through the prints as well but, sadly, none continued to be found. She pointed out the actual painting (for $400) and I said, of course I want it but I can't afford half that much. It was very sad. Then I dithered about and looked at the other prints (they'd some very nice dragon ones), convincing myself I should not be sad but buy something else, but really staring sadly at the painting. Then the shop owner asked if I was really was willing to pay $200.

After protesting that it was much too little (and shutting up my brain that had been ready to spend a little money for something small instead of a lot of money for something awesome), I did buy the painting, complete with frame. (Take that, stupid money-worrying brain. Good frames can be more than expensive all by themselves, and I got it all together! Properly done and everything, and they told me how to care for it but, other than that I need a feather duster because of the way dust will settle on the frame, I remember nothing. I was so, so drunk and happy.) The artist was there as well and they talked about people making a bee line to the shop (which we had, and had seen the painter in the window seat, though we'd not known who he was at the time), and sending them to a good home, and that they can set the price because they own it. (They also told me that they, and most places, will hold onto purchases so they needn't be carried, to which I replied that I would probably leave without them. They said it didn't happen often, but occasional someone would return the next morning to pick up what they'd forgotten. Granted, these are probably several hundred dollars someone just spent, so they'd probably remember.) I gave everyone a hug and was stupendously happy as we left, and then I listened to the organ for the last few minutes, (sitting with my amazing painting, which was wrapped) and he played the adam's family. On the organ. We all snapped and clapped.

In all, a lovely day, and I shall hang the painting this afternoon, when I am less worried about disturbing people. (Most everyone has today off, it's a federal holiday and so no one in dc works.)

The end. (of my attention span. adios!)

old post

Sun, 12 Sep 2010 16:24:35 GMT

I wrote this on the airplane when flying back from DC after coming for my "job interview" and finding an apartment. So, early march some time. And then I left it to sit on the desk top until today, when I have decided it is annoying and I want it to go away. Therefore, here it shall be posted and the .doc on my computer dismissed.
It's interesting to see the things I got completely wrong, and what is important and I didn't notice...

********************
Since I’m in the air, perhaps I should jot this down quick. (also, I love biscofts. They taste like brown sugar and cinnamon. Yum yum.)

Let’s talk about my misadventures over the past two days. Applying for a job was easy, just returning to where I interned at, though being told I now had to dress ‘more professionally’ has very much confused me. I thought I have dressed more professionally. I’ll have to look it up online.

Yesterday, I rented a place to live. I was about to go out and look at other places when this one popped up. The other places were under $1000 but seventeen minutes from the metro, this was $1155, plus gas and electric, but two blocks from the metro. On top of that, the first month was free (or, a security deposit of $99). The real seller was that it was two blocks down and that was very easy to walk to (dreary, wet days do not encourage walking to look at apartments). So off I set, and I pass the ‘Colonial Village’ all but immediately. I turn at the next block and walk up and down the street trying to find the place. I call the renting office but get the emergency maintenance office, am very confused and head back home. I double check the number, and then call for directions, and start out again. While I’m out being lost (a second time) I call and confess my inability to find anything. Finally, the problem is solved – I turned a street too early. I was on N Rhodes, not N Troy. And, it turns out, the emergency maintenance office is always on call and answers the phone when no one is around. (also, maintenance is a horribly difficult word to spell.)

It’s a lovely place, and it has a court yard, so I was sold. (wood floors, lots of space, most windows facing west, I believe. I’ll have to look at a map sometime. Being a genius, I don’t even recall my number.)

I couldn’t sign the lease though, because I brought neither social security card nor passport. I’m not even sure where the former is (my room is a mess), so I’ll be signing the lease and receiving my keys on the 11th. (It’s mine though, they have my security deposit.)

The security deposit was another thing. They wanted a money order, not check or cash, so they send me off to the post office. It’s right down the street, super easy to find. But I’m four dollars short (and some odd cents) of $99. I bought a ticket for the metro the other day. Fortunately, I do have the money, so I trek back up the street (you know, three whole blocks) where I am locked out and wait around to be let into Bethany and John’s apartment. (If someone asks, just lie and say you are a resident. I don’t know why I didn’t; if he didn’t know by looking, he wouldn’t know the difference. Stupid git. The nice woman let me right in.) So then I found the extra twenty I had stashed, took a breather and recollected myself. (The hill is slight but I was feeling immensely stupid at that point; also, this was supposed to take twenty minutes, tops, so I hadn’t slowed before and I really wanted to now).

It was a good break, in that it let me think it over and decide I really did want the place, instead of just a willingness to pick any place. It’s close to the metro, that free month will probably cover gas and electric for the first year, my friends are close, and there’s a courtyard. Honestly, the courtyard was the selling point. It’s like it’s own private little garden – no dogs allowed, which means no random poop either. There’s benches and what not, which’ll be nice in the summer.

That was the adventure of the apartment. More exciting things happened that evening, the main one being a lecture from the Honorable Dr. Joan Luchachean (sp?). She’s the head of ocean stuff in the government, including (but not limited to) NOAA. (See, professionally, I’ll have to remember this stuff a little better.) Bethany, John, Karen, Bryan and I all met up there (or close to) and hung around afterwards then went out for some amazing thai in the china town mall/cinema.

Today, being Wednesday, I said goodbye to everyone in the morning, but had slept really badly. Honestly, once I woke up to pee, I hardly fell back to sleep. I was still very tightly wound from all my earlier stresses and, I believe, it was well after 5 when I finally calmed myself down and drifted back to sleep. Instead of visiting my apartment again, to take pictures, or AU, to say hi to people, I hung around Bethany and John’s, half asleep, and wrote. With two hours to reach the airport, I left. I should have gone fifteen minutes sooner.

There was some mechanical issue on Foggy Bottom, which meant my ten minute metro ride (having already waited ten minutes for the train to arrive in 4) was in trouble. I took the long loop around (skipping the blue line) instead of waiting. There’s never any way to know if that was the right decision or not, but I wasn’t the only one making it. It was five already, so the trains were crowded, and we just all pushed in. I was fortunate and caught both those trains with either no on a 2 min wait. I reached my gate with five minutes to spare, but we boarded seriously late, so I got some writing time in.

Now, I am sitting in an air plane, a little one direct from DC to GR, which I may use more often because, despite the price, is so very very convenient. If I buy my ticket earlier (AMS bought this ticket to bring me in for the job interview)

Plans landing, chao!

Ps: on the plane, I had a full two seats all to myself (that would be all the seats in my aisle. It was very nice.)

feeling groovy

Tue, 31 Aug 2010 12:33:20 GMT

Lately, when I say I'm feeling good, it's a relative thing. Compared to the previous day/week, I feel good. Compared to a normal or average health, I would use a less optimistic adjective. Today, however, I'm feeling a lot better. My left ankle is a little soar and my fingers are feeling fat and stiff, but I feel refreshed and the pain is inconsequential. Now, all we must do is convince the weather gods that it should be more fall-like and less summer-like (a project that would work better in higher latitudes, I know), and then my life will be complete.

new sun rises

Sat, 21 Aug 2010 11:15:02 GMT

(actually, it's always the same star and, in relation to our planet, not moving at all. Better to say, my world turns to the sun - 'my world' being my personal/social world, not my planet)

Anywho

Thought I'd just drop a line to say that I'm feeling much better lately. I've even been helping out with cleaning out the basement storage units at work. It's a bit of physical work (the guys are finally learning that I can, actually, lift a box. If I pick one up, I can carry it into the hallway and go through it (recycling, shredding and trashing whatever's inside). I don't understand why this is considered a show of strength. Yes, few of the boxes are light, but seriously, they're boxes of paper, not water or lead. And I'm not volunteering to move them ALL or anything, which they use a dolly for anyway.) mmm... rambling? The point? I'm not dying from the effort, and I'm enjoying myself. The only time I'm really tired now is when I don't get enough sleep.

Yay!

getting better

Thu, 19 Aug 2010 10:41:40 GMT

Hello,

I feel a zillion times better last night and on into tonight. This could be from many things, including the self-enforced rest (though not the self-enforced sleep, as I stayed up way to late every day this week but last night. I always walk up better when I get more sleep, go figure). Also, it's cooled off several times over the past few weeks, so I've had the windows open, and it's been raining, which I love. (I have come to recognize the difference between a happy Katie and healthy Katie, but it's amazing how the two can influence and ignore each other.)

in case you're curious, no, it hasn't gone away. And, yes, I felt this good previously and then plummeted instead of continuing on to full health. But, like many things, you appreciate what you got (I stretched this morning! Shut up and be amazed. Its not often I'm awake enough, early enough, and feeling well enough that I can stretch/yoga/whatever.) Unlike previous healthy spikes, however, there is no imminent stressful situations to knock me back down. Hopefully, if I don't stress myself, I can continue to be heal and be all better. (At which point I'll stop doing exciting things, like morning stretching, because I am lazy and then I will be upset with myself for not taking advantage of healthy times.)

...
Every notice how much I like to ramble when I feel good?
Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!!!

exhausted or just lazy?

Sat, 14 Aug 2010 13:42:20 GMT

I have decided the former, as it took me the majority of an annoying npr radio blurb to get up and turn the stupid thing off. (I do like most of their clips, even the ones that I don't find interesting, but I do not need to have a childrens' story about a yeddish chicken read to me, thank you very much.)

This troubles me more than it normally does because it's a cool, overcast day today. I've already missed the farmers market (it starts at 8, and I had forced myself out of bed by then but I never left the house), and should go for a walk. I think I'll end up going back to bed when I finish this. Does it still count as a nap if it's before 10? Yesterday, I came home at 6:30 and hardly remember falling asleep but when I woke up (very groggily) it was after 9 and I dragged myself up so I could eat dinner. If I hadn't chatted with Jenni online, I probably would've gone right back to sleep. Most of the pain is gone, I'm just so tired. I might just blame the overcast weather; I can still do that, right? ;-)

In other news, no grad school for next year. Did I mention I was looking into this? My work schedule is 8-4, which leaves lots of time for evening classes and, because I'm going to be forced to move next spring/summer (apartment renovations, I can either be moved into another apartment on site, or I could go elsewhere) I could potentially find a place close to whatever university that accepted me. (Ignore the fact that I hate school, I think I might have to go back again. Up until this point in my life, I've been angling for a field research job, maybe with the park service or something. If I want to do research again, it'd be helpful to get some laboratory experience. I haven't been in a lab since biochem, back in '02 or '03.)

I've two reasons for calling the search off. First is health. I couldn't handle any classes right now, evening or otherwise. It's difficult for me to find time to write my stories (or even post this). Most of my energy goes into work, and occasionally visiting with friends, which takes time to recover from. (yes, I am that pitiful) I couldn't handle the extra time commitment, from classes to class work, required for grad school. On the other hand, I would hope to have some better idea, or coping method, by next fall.

The other, and real, reason has nothing to do with that. My boss is causing havoc at work, which is a rant within itself, and shall be summed up by the evidence that three of our long term employees (remember, that's about a third of the people I work with) are brushing up their resumes. A masters program would stick me here about three more years, a phd over twice that. On the flip side, I could wait until next year, or the year after, to begin searching, hoping by that time I know what's wrong with me and how to handle it, and look beyond the DC area for schools. Maybe I could get a second masters in the area, (taking two night classes all year long would still finish me in two years, maybe a bit more, all depending, of course) and then go elsewhere. I could even get a job writing or editing for science ... stuff. (When am I going to learn this terminology?) That wouldn't require anymore schooling.

So, there's one more thing off my plate. I am becoming rather skilled at emptying that thing. I should put finding a doctor at the top of the list, but I'm tired so I'm going to lay down. If I'm not asleep by 10, I will get up and try to be productive. My living room is a disaster.

seriously?

Mon, 19 Jul 2010 21:05:35 GMT

Three months, three engagements.

Would you people stop that!?!

let's go back to Tuesday night

Fri, 16 Jul 2010 16:53:49 GMT

Monday night is normally trivia night but was canceled because I was the only one that could make, it and, without any exaggeration, I suck at trivia. So I stayed at home and took it easy. (My unknown diagnosis had been acting up the week before and I thought, maybe I could rest it away. I am un-knowledgeable about this.)

Tuesday night, my brewing supplies & kits show up. (Seriously, I paid 13 bucks for a large paint pail because I couldn't FIND one at the hardware stores. Ace is stupid. At least, this way, I don't have to drill holes in them. I'm sure that's worth $10 plus shipping, each. grumble.) There was also a note from my apartment-complex owner-people. (I like in a 'heritage' site, FYI, so if they want to do anything to the buildings, the process is a bit more elaborate.) The brewing supplies were all good, except it looks like the ale yeast might've been activated because some idiot packed it under the ingredients box instead of next to it. (There are two 9 gallon pales in this box, it has a very clear up/down feel to it, and the two ingredient boxes aren't light.)

The letter from the apartment people said that they're planning renovations in April 2011, once they're passed by a board or something this January. They'll be updating the windows, kitchens, bathrooms, etc in all apartments. To do this, they'll be moving everyone one house over each time and we'll get 120 days warning. In the FAQ, there was a question about gas & electric (which is paid separately) and it said that the stoves would be changed to electric. I'd also be losing the awesome tree outside my window. I'm now planning to move next summer. If I move within the 120 window, they'll cover my moving bills. (They cover them for moving from apartment A to apartment B).

Wednesday morning, the metro had a smoking electrical panel at Metro Center and, eventually, I got on a train in the opposite direction so I would be able to board one. Earlier, I learned why it is dangerous to carry an easily spooked cat before dressing (band-aids are my friend). (Work was a little odd, but it'd take longer to explain the reason than it is worth. We did put the booth up, though, and i found it very exhausting, which was because I had the plague and didn't know it yet.) That evening the Nielsen guy (TV ratings) showed up to ask if I wanted to participate and find out which demographic I fit. I told him I'd represent the "people who don't own TVs".

I almost didn't go to work Thursday, but I figured I was just tired. I came home early and slept the afternoon away then, for the life of me, couldn't sleep well at night, despite having drugged myself. I was asleep for the earthquake, as I have no clear memory of it. (DC had a tiny little earthquake, notable only because DC doesn't have earthquakes.) I almost went to work today, I had much lunch ready and was putting my make up on and everything. But make up requires one to look in a mirror and i caught my own eye and told myself 'no'. So I emailed work and went back to bed.

I am now a germ factory. Or a germ battlefield. Vive el cuerpo!

Moving in Monday

Fri, 09 Jul 2010 20:09:50 GMT

Having always lived in shared housing, where the bills naturally arrive in the mail, I'd assumed my gas and electric would do the same thing. And then, once I received them, I would put them in my name and pay them myself. Interesting fact, this is not how apartments work.

When no bills arrived the first month, I assumed they were done on a tri-monthly cycle (four times a year), which meant it should've showed in March but, since I'd just moved in, I figured I missed it (and I wouldn't be paying the Jan-March bill anyway), and waited until the end of May. When I still hadn't recieved it by mid-June, I realized I was probably missing something but I didn't even know who to call. Then I was gone to the cottage for fun, then to Norman, OK for work, then my parents visited for the fourth, and I've been meaning to get to it all week. It's Friday now, I just did my phone calls, and they're 'turning on' my gas and electric (two companies) this Monday. I told the gas company what'd happened and they said they'd 'turn it on' on July 12th for me. I just told the electric company that my move in date was Monday.

Other than a slight fear that either gas or electric will turn off over the weekend, I have apparently gotten away with four months of free gas and electric. Happy Birthday to me!

not my engagement

Wed, 07 Jul 2010 22:14:32 GMT

All my friends in DC are either engaged or married (two engagements in the past two months). Since they were either seriously dating or married before, and I'm good friends with the fiances already, this hasn't really changed much except in terminology. Of course, terminology is what we all obsess about, and I had to pick at it to figure out what is fazed me. It comes down to this, while I don't really care if I have a boyfriend/fiance/husband/etc or not (as in, it'd be great and wonderful but I'm not going out of my way to find this mystery man), I do feel like I'm being left out. Not excluded (I don't feel like a third, fifth or any other odd number multiple, wheel). It's much more like everyone else I know is part of sorority-fraternity. I don't want to join myself, but... well, I fell left out. (I got an online boyfriend in high school because a friend had one, then he talked seriously and I dumped him.)

I'm content as I am, I actually prefer being single. I know that's very unusual but I don't care. I might just stay this way for the rest of my life. Unfortunately, I've discovered that I have grandmothers and aunts that didn't marry until well into their 30s, and that was even back in the early-mid 1900s. To counter it, I have some very nice spinster great aunts and, having asked one if she ever regretted it, I have no worries about being perfectly happy living into my old, old age without a husband or children.

well, aren't I pissy?

Sat, 05 Jun 2010 17:07:00 GMT

I woke up this morning, at quarter to five, because of a headache that was trying to kill me. I'd one when I went to bed, so I'd drunken a lot of water and took some aspirin. Trying to repeat that when half asleep is really a strange experience, it included feeding the cats and nearly watering the plants, except that I wanted to drink that water so they couldn't have it. I, sorta, got back to sleep, but dreamed about long knives, killing people, blood, abandonment, hot marshes, and scary hobos. (I remember all of it, but it's really upsetting.) I didn't woke up late and not refreshed and was really slow about moving, so I did my laundry instead of going to the farmers market, only to get a call from a friend twenty minutes later about meeting she and boy at the farmers market. I'd to wait until the laundry was out of the washer and the only dryer was a bottom one, which doesn't work as well. (There were hardly any washers available either, I sorta wish I'd waited for this after.) Anyway, by the time I got to the market, my friends were leaving (they'd bought crab meat) but hadn't found a bike to buy (there's also a flea market) and I'd have gone shopping with them but my clothes were still in the dryer and I didn't want someone to be so impatient to pull my clothes out if I wasn't there. And now my clothes are hung on the doors and back of chairs because they didn't dry, and the bread people weren't at the market so, no bread. It's also hot and muggy out, and I'm scared of the heat so I'm staying inside.

HOWEVER, there was cabbage at the market. I now have cabbage.
That'll make life better.

Oddity of Morning

Tue, 11 May 2010 13:55:03 GMT

Nothing quite as exciting as a loud 'thud' as one finishes brushing her teeth. Nothing broke, but Carter and Dresden knocked over their cat tree. (I figure this is quite an achievement, considering it's not too tall and rather solidly set.) My cats are ridiculous and awesome.

So, most every morning, I get up around 6, shower, feed the cats, eat, brush teeth, apply makeup, get dressed and leave around 7:40. (I've cats with black hair, there is no dressing in nice clothes until I leave.) This morning, on top of all that, I wouldn't get out of bed, drank mate, fed the cats a second time (I'll be home later than normal), cleaned the kitty litter (we're having to resolve some issues with that), picked Carter up a half dozen times because he was feeling ignored, rebuilt (twice) the packing boxes & packaging paper mound (very cheap cat toy, which they love), chased Dresden about, and washed my bowl (this is a new habit, I'm trying to get it to stick).
I was ten minutes early for work!

(you wouldn't know from my updating this, but I've actually been rather busy this morning, here at work, which I was early for. ;)

cats and fish

Fri, 07 May 2010 00:22:15 GMT

Sick of some of those politics? Need a laugh?

http://www.twolumps.net/d/20100416.html

(The first few are just cats and fish. I'd tell you more but it's more fun to discover it on your own.)

ain't so bad

Wed, 05 May 2010 23:17:03 GMT

I've got my cats and they humor me.
The pain from the last time has receded. I'm not even on the meds.
Work is boring but workable.
I've got friends to watch Doctor Who and play trivia at the bar with.

All in all, not so bad.

sick

Fri, 02 Apr 2010 14:59:07 GMT

Someone must hear of my stupid morning and, as I am home sick, you are my only outlet. (I believe my voice is mostly gone as well but I'm not testing it.)

First off, I could not get my body out of bed, and, while I've become fond of the snooze button, it normally doesn't take me thirty minutes just stand up (I'm one of those hateful morning people, after all) and so I was running late. Then I turned the hot water on for the shower and, despite the nob moving in my hand, the actually metal connection (into the wall) didn't turn. I almost went back to bed. A fair amount of force (like pushing on a child-proof medicine lid) earned me a hot shower (thank god) and I even got it off again (also tricky). I ate very quickly, and then lost more time because I had to blow dry my hair (it was still wet). Then, of course, there's a list of things I couldn't find, ranging from my key card (which I hope I left at work, but that means I'll have to ring the doorbell to get in on Monday) to lunch money to my kleenex (which is a bandanna, actually, and if you ever want to hear an unscientific rant about why fabric is better than tissue paper, you just have to ask).

Eventually, I was pulling on my socks (couldn't find them either), realizing I wouldn't be phenominially late, and then that I planned on coming home after lunch because I felt really horrid. Having been distracted (I was walking around with one shoe and sock on, for some reason), it dawned on me that I really felt bad. I flipped a coin, it wasn't heads, I turned my computer back on, sent an email to say I was sick (and sent it without the 'e', so I signed it 'Kati'), changed, washed my face, and climbed back into bed.

But that's not the end of it.

My rent money was due yesterday (the 1st) , but I only received my paycheck yesterday (instead of Wednesday) because of flooding up in Boston. I opened a bank account yesterday, but that check won't clear until Monday morning. Since I went to see the cherry blossoms after work yesterday (which was stupid, I was feeling so much better until that little excursion), I didn't get home until after 6, which meant the office was closed. The plan was to turn the check in today after work, a day late, but no huge deal. Because i get out of work half an hour before the office (for Colonial Village) closes, that means I could give them the check a day late and there's no way they'd process it until Monday morning. With the broken shower, I figured I would call and 'ask' how to turn the check in if I arrived home after the office closes and then add that my shower needed to be fixed (immediately). You see the problem if I stayed home sick? I can't be in the apartment when they come to fix the faucet, or else I could turn the check in any time today!

Therefore, life is stupid. I'll just walk over at 3 or 4 and hand them the check and put the stupid request in then (so much for immediate fixing). Also, I'm missing Tom's birthday lunch and an easy day at the office because no one is there (it's the week of vacations). Not to mention, I'm really sick. I repeat my earlier conclusion: life is really stupid.

(and that's how things are going for me. How about you?)

hi

Sun, 28 Mar 2010 13:06:34 GMT

To save you from one of my mental rants (I'm being re-introduced to the human effects on the planet, from a 'developed' country's view point, way too fast), I shall, instead, share with you the lovely time I had yesterday.

Among the unexpected benefits of my new apartment is the organic farmer's market just across the street. (A 'large' street, but we're walker friendly here, so it is easy to cross.) Yesterday morning, Bethany, John and I went shopping there and then visited the flea market afterward. (When I have money, I am going to lose a lot of it on the potential furniture I can purchase there.) So I have kale and sweet potatoes, which will be making some yummy food this afternoon for the rest of the week. (I do have other ingredients.)

Since it was a gorgeous, though surprisingly chilly morning, Bethany and John decided to go to the Zoo, and I joined them. Karen and Bryan joined us, after we visited the bird house, which I'd not yet entirely seen yet. (There's an outdoor aviary that closes at early-ish and seasonally; and then, after they started the development for the new elephant enclosure, which'll be done next year, the bird house was a bit out of the way. I always meant to visit it after everything else, and then was too tired to bother.) The Koli Buster is now my favorite bird, though it is very scary. Oh! And several of the birds escaped when it snowed! They'd brought most of them inside, because of the weight on the nets on the outdoor cages, but three collapsed entirely. The flamingos were still there, as was the golden pheasant (I believe) and I thought he should be called the helmet pheasant. I dubbed him my pet, as he 'followed' us out of the enclosure. At least, until the path passed the peacock and then the pheasant went in the opposite direction. I want my cats! I need furry (not feathery) friends!

Seeing the gorillas with Karen was great fun, as she volunteers with them and knows so much. They're a whole family dynamic, including trouble with the two 'young' boys. Of course, we checked out the small mammals and the invertibrates as well (octopus was sleeping, the young cuttlefish were slightly spastic), and the lions were all very regal while the tiger was sleeping on his side like he was dead. That is probably more than anyone really needs to know about the zoo life. But the weather really warmed up and it was wonderful to be outside.

After frozen yogurt (very disappointed in my chocolate), John and Bethany left (he just returned from Switzerland on Friday) while the rest of us watched Torchwood (Dr Who spinoff) with pizza and beer until 10. I really appreciated sitting down after walking all afternoon. On the way home (Karen and Bryan live very far away) I walked onto every train, no waiting!! (That is amazing for a night on the metro. You should be impressed.)

In other news, my job is sorta boring but that's because I haven't any projects of my own yet. I'm just doing a lot of background reading. I was just given a really neat NASA climate change model to play with but my computer is so slow that it takes an hour to run through two years (the tutorial ranges from 1957 - 2101). I can stop it and run the analyzes whenever I like, thankfully, and then I'll come up with some questions for our investigation manual. I just barely got 11 years out of it Friday, so I'll run it for awhile Monday morning. I'm helping with a grant as well, but not writing it and the woman that is has more on her plate than just that. Waiting, waiting.

I am glad to be back in DC, and among friends, again. There are things to do here - events like the Cherry Blossom that I did last year when I was leaving, and weekly things, like trivia night (I suck at trivia) and the caving meetings, that I thought I'd never do again. It's weird to think of my life in years, instead of seasons or semesters. It's weird that I have a job that I go to every day - an office with walls I should decorate. It's weird that this is 'my' apartment, that there's no automatic time-limit on it and this is all 'my' space. It's weird. But I don't believe in life's consistency yet, so we'll wait and see how it turns out.

good news

Mon, 08 Feb 2010 18:43:22 GMT

The pain meds are working!
I cut up a whole box of strawberries and my hands still don't hurt! This is SO cool!! (even yesterday, when I made soup, all the cutting and chopping hurt. But not today!!) Yay for functional me!